Victoria Volk, The Unleashed Heart, LLC public
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Grieving Voices

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Grieving Voices

Victoria Volk, The Unleashed Heart, LLC

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Grieving Voices is a podcast started by a lifelong griever for grievers. The mission of Grieving Voices is to change the conversation around grief, and how we address our own and that of others and give grievers a platform for sharing what grief has taught them. Through education and personal story, listeners will learn more effective ways to help themselves and others. The Grieving Voices podcast is part of The Unleashed Heart, LLC. Grief resources and additional support are available at ww ...
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The question, "What can I do to support myself in my grief," has a simple answer in four words that I don't share in the episode but is explored through the self-reflection exercise contained in the episode. What are the four words? Get - To - Know - Yourself. ✨ In this week's episode, you will do just that. Before you listen, I suggest you get in …
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Melody and Gracelyn are an aunt and niece team behind Luna Peak Foundation and Luna Peak Publishing. Through their nonprofit, they publish photography books, engaging workbooks, and children's books that show people they are not alone in grief. Their work helps dispel stereotypes about cancer and grief and provides resources for the whole family to…
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Being an eternal optimist means always looking on the bright side and having hope, no matter what obstacles might attempt to push you off your path. Some people may not necessarily be eternal optimists. However, they've become incredibly good at reframing a challenging situation for the better. I would say I am more of a "reframing" type. However, …
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May is Mental Health Awareness Month! Taking mental health seriously and prioritizing it is the job of the individual. Even if you find yourself in a situation where you are forced to prioritize your mental health, that doesn't necessarily equate to successful results. The effort you make, along with your intention, will create positive outcomes. W…
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When tragedy strikes or challenging times knock on a family's door, the children involved can feel cast aside or as if they are an afterthought while the adults are experiencing their emotional crisis. However, it doesn't have to be that way. As adults become more knowledgeable about grief, learning new tools and new information, beliefs about grie…
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Quandell's first episode was Ep. 28 | The Scars of Abuse, Poverty, and Shame, recorded in October 2020 and went live on January 5th, 2021. Listening to Quandell's first episode is recommended to appreciate where Quandell was and how far he's come in his life. He asks one question in this episode: "How do you grieve?" It's a question we all would be…
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Many grief terms have come about to describe grief: abbreviated absent anticipatory chronic collective complicated distorted disenfranchised inhibited delayed masked normal The American Psychological Association describes complicated grief as grief that seems to deviate from what’s expected, interfering with the ability to function. Isn't that grie…
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Bill Gross, the founder of the non-profit Farm Rescue, has been traveling the world with his career as a UPS pilot for the past 30 years. However, his heart never left or forgot the farm he called home in ND. He knew he wanted to give back to ND farmers once he retired; however, a chance conversation prompted him to ask himself: "Why wait?" We don'…
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It happens often; we hear people say they want or need closure. We also hear it on crime shows and true crime documentaries, too. However, what feels more accurate, and what would be a more helpful expression of what those left behind genuinely desire? Listen to this quick Q&A on closure and discover why it's unhelpful and what would be a more accu…
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Susana is no stranger to grief. As a young child, she was a victim of sexual abuse. As a young adult, she lost her mother, later becoming her father's caretaker, only to eventually lose him. The death of her nephew to suicide was when she realized that she could do something - that she needed to do something. Susana would put her strengths, skills,…
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The question on today's podcast is one I have heard a lot and one I've also asked myself if I'm being honest. It's normal and natural to ask ourselves questions like this, and it doesn't mean that you mean any ill will towards others. It also doesn't mean other people are "bad"; bad things should happen to them instead. I see this question as an ex…
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Jill's father walked out of their home when she was sixteen months old and didn't return. He died in a plane crash, and her life was forever changed. Fortunately, her mental health was of the utmost importance, having received counseling and therapy throughout her childhood and adulthood. During that time, the groundwork was being laid to prepare h…
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In this first Q&A episode, Ruth asks why she's struggling more with her spouse's death than the death of her parents. In my response, I share a perspective you may find helpful when considering your losses. Whether you've been married for five, fifteen, or forty years, or your parents died when you were young or in your fifties, death may finalize …
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What is to come in 2023 for Grieving Voices? Tune in to this episode to find out all of the details. Before you listen, I want to share that this episode came to be after months and months of stewing and contemplation, trying to logically come to a resolution of what to do about Grieving Voices. Should I stop podcasting? Take a sabbatical? I wasn't…
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What does family mean to you? Who makes up your family? Not only those you claim by blood but those you choose, who show up when life throws curveballs? There are reasons to grieve family; the family you wish you had and even the family you may wish you didn't have, too. We can't choose our family, but we have a say in their role in our lives. And,…
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When you fill out your calendar, do you intentionally set time aside to reflect and for introspection? Probably not. Most of us don't do so. However, as Kevin shares in this episode, doing so for his grief has made all of the difference in his life. Kevin speaks to the cumulative losses of his career, his father, his mother, and subsequent divorce.…
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Grief is cumulative, and it's cumulatively negative. Every loss we experience stacks on top of those before it. For Genesis Amaris Kemp, attending funerals started becoming a regular occurrence. Add the loss of loved ones before the Covid pandemic (and during) to the loss of a job during the same timeframe, and it can be challenging to find solid f…
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Was your childhood filled with joy and surrounded by love and support? There may have been some challenging times for your parents or even for you, but what if you indeed did have the ideal life? Dan's childhood was amazing. So when grief hit home hard, and hard it did, he was ill-prepared. He had experienced the death of his grandparents, but even…
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Melissa's episode embodies several different ways one may experience grief. And as she shares each story, she also provides insight into loss from her perspective as a clinical psychologist. At age 4, her older sister (age 7) died of leukemia. Melissa's earliest memories are related to her sister battling leukemia for eighteen months and being boun…
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We are all going to die. However, none of us know when, although some may know how (as with a terminal illness). One thing we can do for ourselves and our loved ones, not knowing when our last day will come, is to prepare for it. We will spare our loved ones from making many complex (and conflicting) decisions. You can be your own hero and that of …
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Tim's grief was compounded by the loss of his best friend and then-wife within a year of each other. It's enough to send anyone into a tailspin as it did for Tim. He found himself at the lowest point in his life. Grief-stricken, he found solace in a bottle until a friend asked him if he thought he had been drinking too much. From then on, he consid…
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According to Johns Hopkins, 240,000 medical error deaths occur every year. Betsy learned that when it comes to the healthcare system and being a caregiver, becoming informed and a fierce advocate is the only option. Betsy learned real-life experience about medical advocacy while her husband survived prostate cancer, only to be diagnosed with bone m…
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What do you want to happen if you are incapacitated while on your deathbed or after you die? If you don't have a will, that decision may be left up to the state. These are big questions that often don't have answers for those who are left behind. In the most emotional moments, the family is left to make decisions that weren't theirs. Each of us has…
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There are two camps of grievers; those who talk about their grief and share their stories and those who keep their grief and stories hidden. Regardless of the camp, you find yourself in, there is one common denominator that is often present with most, if not all, grievers - anger. There is a caveat to sharing your story, though. As we look for mean…
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Christian is one of nine children born and raised in Cuba during turbulent times and in the Catholic faith. His parents instilled in him the importance of excelling and reading. These early lessons laid a foundation. However, those lessons also set the stage for a desire to escape and not be seen. Introversion and depression plagued his adolescence…
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Less than 1% of Americans serve in the U.S. military. That leaves 99% of Americans who will never understand the cost of serving their country, particularly during wartime. Scott shares his path to emotional freedom from the scars of war after deploying to Afghanistan with his brother, Steven. Rather than Scott celebrating homecoming with his broth…
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Every human being experiences trauma to some degree. We don't have to experience "Big T Traumas" for those experiences to leave an imprint on our hearts and bodies. At age 5, Kimberly had such an experience after witnessing her father physically abuse her mother while she and her older sibling were present. And, because they were in a vehicle, ther…
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People say you have to move on or that you should "be over it by now." However, no one tells you or shows you how to do it. For me, after struggling to get beyond the pain of my trauma and losses for 30+ years, the Grief Recovery Method was the how. Naysayers and doubters are welcome. 🤗 I was a skeptic, too. How could a process or method help me mo…
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They say it's unnatural to lose a child. And, there's no word for a parent who has lost a child other than griever, which somehow doesn't embody all a parent experiences—much less childless parents. What is a word for a parent whose only child dies? As it turns out, there's maybe only one that might describe that inconsolable feeling - lost. Phil f…
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Reid is the creator of the Grief Refuge app and supports grievers through publishing daily audio messages that soothe and comfort people pained by grief. Grief is something Reid grew up knowing well. As a young adult, his biological father, who struggled with alcohol abuse, died by suicide. Fortunately, his stepfather came into his life as a child …
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They say it's unnatural for a parent to outlive and bury a child. Likewise, it's not natural for a child to bury their parent. There is no hierarchy of loss. We all grieve at 100%, and there are no half-grievers. Therefore, all losses are felt at 100%, too. So, who's to say what loss is worse than the next? However, for a moment, put yourself in th…
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Finding our way home to self is the journey we’re all on in the physical plain. So that hopefully, when our time is drawing near, we will have experienced a life well-lived. A life filled with joy and more importantly, one of peace. In this week's episode, I share a bit about my journey finding my way home back to myself. And also discuss the stori…
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Ram Dass Khalsa is a singer-songwriter who, through the loss of his newborn son to Trisomy-18, learned how to write a new song as he learned how to grieve healthily. It would take Ram Dass several years to learn what it means to grieve healthily, and growing up with "yogi" parents, taught him the importance of being in his body. However, he never l…
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Imagine identifying your parent for a crime, knowing that what you disclose will send your only parent to prison. Imagine moving 11x by the time you were in the 5th grade. And imagine being the child of a parent who, for most of your childhood, was struggling with undiagnosed bipolar disorder. Kyira was no stranger to chaos and uneasiness. She was …
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We all have intuition. And we all have the power to tap into the intuition within us, too. However, sometimes our intuition doesn't feel good to us. As was the case the day that Stephanie's father wasn't coming home as was expected. She looked out the window, saw his car but didn't see him and instinctively knew something wasn't right. At the age o…
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This week's episode is an invitation to look at how you had been mothered and nurtured by your mother (or mother figure) as a child and how that has influenced you today. I also bring Mother Nature into the conversation because what Mother Nature gives us is a great analogy, in general, for the topic of experiencing mothering and nurturing. When wa…
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Were you born and raised in the land of the free and home of the brave, the United States of America? This week's episode reminds me that oppression and enslavement are not only in Yemen, where this week's guest was born but also in the free world. It just looks different from what Maha experienced. Ironically, Maha fled Yemen, where she experience…
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How would you live your life if a ticking time bomb was woven into the very fabric of your everyday life? Would you carry on business as usual? Would you live like tomorrow is not guaranteed and chip away at your bucket list? Rachael's story isn't about a ticking time bomb that is in her body. Rather, it is about the ticking time bomb of grief that…
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In this week's episode, Michele of @soaringspiritsintl and a 2021 Top 10 CNN Hero, shares her story about the challenges of blending a family, but then enduring a devastating loss and grieving as a blended family. But because grief is cumulative and cumulatively negative, a previous divorce, followed by the sudden death of her spouse, then the deat…
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As a mother, carrying and growing another human in the womb for nine months, it is expected that a healthy child will be born. However, for Elizabeth, that is not what happened. Her world was shattered when she realized that she wouldn't be a new mom overflowing with joy. Rather, she would become a mother with grieving empty arms. After her firstbo…
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When you're pulled between the feelings of what you wish would be different, better, or more, and faced with a moment where a decision has to be made, it can be challenging to cut through all of the emotion and lean into trust. In this week's Takeaways & Reflections episode, I use Kasey and Michelle's stories to illustrate the challenges we can hav…
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In the grief recovery programs, one way we describe grief is that it is the loss of hopes, dreams, and expectations. This description of grief, in this way, has not been better understood by society as a whole more than it has since 2020 with the onset of the Covid-19 pandemic. As society begins to emerge from the darkness Covid brought to so many …
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Warning: This episode contains a mother's account of her son, CJ's, final days of life. This may be difficult for some listeners to hear, particularly those who have lost a child. 99 Days. How much life can you squeeze out of 99 precious newborn days? Especially when 84 of those are spent in the hospital? Kabuki, a major theatrical form in Japan fo…
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Addiction isn't just applicable to a substance use disorder. Often the anxiousness of learning to live life as a griever can lead to overdoing, busyness, workaholism, etc. We can become addicted to being busy in an effort to avoid feeling our feelings. "Keeping Busy" is actually one of the 6 Myths of Grief. In this week's Takeaways & Reflections ep…
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This week's episode is a collaboration with my friend, Dru Jaeger, co-founder of Club Soda and author of How to Be a Mindful Drinker: Cut Down, Take a Break, or Quit. Dru woke up one morning a happy child with two parents and went to bed that night without a mother. She died suddenly and unexpectedly of a massive brain hemorrhage. Within six months…
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When you're in a place of self-loathing, self-love likely won't come naturally and will be challenging to prioritize and do. However, when grieving, self-love must be a non-negotiable aspect of grieving to grieve well. In this week's episode, I cover the eight dimensions of wellness courtesy of the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Adminis…
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"Bang, I made a mistake!" Those were the words, my guest, Wayne Forrest, described the moment that changed his life forever. It was a chance happening (or was it?) that Wayne had some teammates out injured from his rugby team, and he filled in to play the game he loved. One play during that game would have him waking up in a hospital bed five days …
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Agoraphobia is a mental and behavioral disorder, specifically an anxiety disorder characterized by anxiety symptoms in situations where the person perceives their environment to be unsafe with no easy way to escape. These situations can include open spaces, public transit, shopping centers, or simply being outside their home. Amy's mom died suddenl…
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In this Takeaways & Reflections episode, I reflect on the importance of not grieving alone. We all need support through grief because, going it alone, keeps us stuck and ruminating on our grief. Connection to others is what gives a griever hope. I also share in this episode how I took a long way around to find the right support for me and the impac…
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Fear can hold you prisoner, hope can set you free. - The Shawshank Redemption This week's guest, Brent Scarpo, was a casting director for one of the most acclaimed and beloved films of all time, "The Shawshank Redemption." Through his personal love of the film, he shares a few of his favorite lessons from the movie. These lessons served him well as…
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