))
I'm Dr. Margaret, a psychologist for over 25 years and the author of Perfectly Hidden Depression. I created The SelfWork Podcast in 2016 to explain mental health treatment, and to give you the chance to consider therapy without thinking it's weird or somehow suggests you can't "fix" your own problems. My team is so honored that five years later, SelfWork has earned nearly 3.5 million downloads! Each episode features the popular listener question. And, once a month, you’ll hear a “You Get the ...
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
331 SelfWork: Suicide - What We Can Do About It
27:00
27:00
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
27:00
This week's episode of SelfWork focuses on suicide - but not as a pre-determined sign that someone needs hospitalization. That might be true, of course. But many, many people have suicidal thoughts or ideas, even fantasies, of what could happen that would allow them to escape pain that may feel intolerable. And in those cases, talking about suicide…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
330 SelfWork (Second Time Around): How to Calm Your Mind or What Would Mister Rogers Say?
27:10
27:10
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
27:10
Today my editor, graphic designer and general "auxiliary brain" Christine Mathias, has chosen her favorite podcast. It's all about self-soothing and Mister Rogers came to mind! And we look at the neurobiology of "calm," featuring work by Dr. Dan Siegel, a psychiatrist, author, researcher and integrative neurobiologist who coined the phrase, “Name i…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
329 SelfWork (Second Time Around): Ten Common Birthplaces of the Shame You Never Deserved... But Carried With You
31:18
31:18
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
31:18
Today's episode has been chosen by my audio engineer and producer, John Crowley, as one of this favorite episodes which earns the status of "good enough for a second time around" slot. And boy, does shame cause problems. People often come into therapy saying things like, “I’m afraid I’m wasting your time, “ or, “I don’t know why I can’t pull myself…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
328 SelfWork: What Comes First - Addiction to Work or Depression?
27:28
27:28
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
27:28
I recently posted about a study group I was doing on my personal FB page and somewhat apologetically explained that I was mixing professional with personal. I received an almost immediate response from a friend who said, “You love what you do so much, I don’t think there’s much of a line between the two.” And I had to laugh. She was right. But then…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
327 SelfWork: The Jungle of Real Motherhood: A Conversation with Annaliese Lawton
39:10
39:10
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
39:10
Real motherhood can certainly seem like you're trudging your way through a jungle of fears, exhaustion, and confusion - so why is it still portrayed as "easy" or "natural"? Author Annaliese Lawton's new book, Welcome To The Jungle, explores her own emotional turmoil associated with maternity coupled with life's daily struggles. Lawton is a small-to…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
326 SelfWork: Digging Into the Pain of Not Being Accepted By Your Family
27:16
27:16
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
27:16
This month we’ve been talking about relationships.This week I heard Andrew Solomon speak about his book Far from the Tree – when parents have a child that has some kind of difference from them, and they struggle not to see that difference as a problem or something that needs to be fixed. I found his ideas fascinating – the relationship between pare…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
325 SelfWork: Why You Might Be Blind to The Warning Signs of Narcissism
30:50
30:50
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
30:50
Today we’re focusing on what mental or emotional issues are connected with being drawn into relationship with someone with narcissistic traits, missing the warning signs that others might sense or see. We’ll briefly cover the different types of narcissism; you can find lists that include anything from four to seven subtypes but we’ll keep it simple…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
324 SelfWork: How To Make And Keep Friends: A Conversation with Marisa Franco, Author of Platonic
43:09
43:09
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
43:09
So much research and time and thought goes into romantic love. But what about platonic love – aka friendship? I loved Marisa Franco’s new book entitled Platonic and this interview is one of my favorites. I especially honor when she describes friendships as being the relationships that are the steadiest your entire life. What you’re about to listen …
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
323 SelfWork: When You Struggle With Intimacy: What Does Your Attachment Style Have to Do With It?
27:00
27:00
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
27:00
Seeming coincidences happen to me often, and again this week, something synergistic got my attention. First, I listened to the Invisibilia podcast where they actually featured another NPR podcast, a show called Life Kit. Dr. Amir Levine was interviewed, who’s an expert on attachment theory – and he spoke on how your attachment style can help and/or…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
322 SelfWork: Understanding The Self-Absorption of Depression and The Damage It Can Do In Relationships
27:49
27:49
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
27:49
Today we’re focusing on self-absorption – being highly preoccupied with your own concerns, your inner thoughts, or yourself in general. Depression can be viewed as an "implosion of the self" which creates self-absorption. I’m speaking of self-absorption not in a condescending or judgmental way, but as a way of helping the person who’s depressed, as…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
321 SelfWork: When You Feel Guilt Over Wasted Time
25:19
25:19
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
25:19
First of all, I cannot express how grateful I am to be back and to be healthy. Fear was very much a part of the weeks before my surgery. I had to realize and accept that I wasn’t in control of what might or might not happen. I was only in control of my response to those things. So that’s what I tried to focus on – how was I going to respond? But al…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
320 SelfWork: New Trauma Treatments with Guest Host Doc Shauna Springer
39:09
39:09
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
39:09
I first met Shauna Springer - or Doc Springer as her military clients call her - when I interviewed her for one of her books, Warrior. There was something about her that I really warmed to and now am glad to call her a friend. Her books demonstrate what an incredible therapist she is, as well as being widely known as an expert on psychological trau…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
319 SelfWork: What's Really Going To Make You Happy? A Conversation with Bob Waldinger
40:25
40:25
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
40:25
Bob Waldinger's publicist used these words to describe him - "warm and humble." That can be hard to find… and I knew I wanted him to be our guest here on SelfWork. He has plenty of things he could crow about (as we’d say in Arkansas). He’s a Harvard professor, 20-year director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development? And his TED Talk is one of th…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
YGTG SelfWork: I'm Back And I Have Two Opportunities for You To Hang Out With Me!
3:54
3:54
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
3:54
Hello everyone in 2023! I wanted to tell you all that my surgery went perfectly – and I’m getting back into gear! I cannot say how grateful I am without tearing up – and have so many thanks for the guest hosts that have filled in so far, Kimberley Quinlan, Lewis Howes and this week Ashley Stahl. Shauna Springer is coming on a week or two – and then…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
318 SelfWork: Ashley Stahl Is Guest Host! Eleven "Mind Shifts" For 2023
28:23
28:23
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
28:23
Ashley Stahl and I met when her book You Turn came out – and to prepare for her interview on SelfWork, not only did I read her book, I watched a couple of her TedTalks – yes she has two! And I thought her advice was solidly based on the importance of values in choosing a career. I saw that she’d established herself extremely well in the entrepreneu…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
317 SelfWork: Lewis Howes Is (Again) Guest Host! With Dr. Margaret Is His Guest!
39:21
39:21
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
39:21
2022 is coming to a close – and 2023 is on its way! So Happy New Year to all! So today’s SelfWork episode turns the tables on me – as I’m being interviewed by Lewis Howes on his incredibly successful podcast, School of Greatness. I listen almost every week to his interviews when I’m out walking, and learn so much from them. And since I was honored …
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
316 SelfWork: Lewis Howes Is Guest Host! (And Dr. M. Is His Guest!)
38:23
38:23
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
38:23
I first met Lewis Howes in 2019, the year Perfectly Hidden Depression was published, as I was a guest on his incredible podcast The School of Greatness. I was flabbergasted to be asked – listen to their own description of the show! "Lewis Howes is a New York Times best-selling author, 2x All-American athlete, keynote speaker, and entrepreneur. The …
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
315 SelfWork: Kimberley Quinlan Is Guest Host! Seven Steps to Intervene In Your Response to Anxiety
30:10
30:10
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
30:10
I first met Kimberley as a guest on her incredible podcast, Your Anxiety Toolkit, after the book Perfectly Hidden Depression came out. She's also been on SelfWork to discuss her own book The Self-Compassionate Workbook for OCD and was an obvious pick to lead off these guest episodes. Why? Because she’s not only an expert at treating anxiety and I k…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
314 SelfWork: Mother (Or Mother-In-Law) Trouble: Answering Your Questions
28:44
28:44
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
28:44
Today, I'll be answering three listener questions about how to make successful transitions with their moms or mothers-in-law. And I chose them because they're very much reflective of common problems you might have yourself. Psychiatry blamed mothers years ago for everything from autism to schizophrenia and that was all plain wrong. Even Freud’s gra…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
313 SelfWork: Five Steps to Build Your Social Muscle and Tackle Self-Consciousness and Social Anxiety
26:53
26:53
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
26:53
Generally, when someone is called “a bundle of nerves,” they’re not describing a state of being that’s pleasant or desired. Those nerves could range from the fairly common experience of self-consciousness, where you have a heightened sense of yourself, to actual social anxiety, when the fear of being perceived negatively or being scrutinized by oth…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
312 SelfWork: Why Not Me? A Conversation with Lessons From the Minivan's Creator Jill Kaplan
38:25
38:25
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
38:25
Click this link to try out some of the best CBD out there! Ozark Mountain Medicine's CBD products and get 10% off! BetterHelp, the #1 online therapy provider, has a special offer for you now! Psychology Today article on "Estrangement: The Silent Epidemic" New York Times article on Fractured Families Forbes article on parental alienation You can hea…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
311 SelfWork: When Families Are Fractured: Estrangement and Parental Alienation
29:18
29:18
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
29:18
The term “cancel culture” came to be around 2016 and according to the dictionary, it’s the practice or tendency of engaging in mass canceling as a way of expressing disapproval and exerting social pressure. Yet, in families, estrangement has been around quite a long time. Parents can distance themselves from children. Adult children can stop “comin…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
310 SelfWork: Maybe It's Depression. But Maybe It's Not.
29:43
29:43
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
29:43
We’re going to talk about labels today - and how the mental health world, its science, its leaders, and its language might be influencing us to over-pathologize what’s normal. Meaning that you can come to believe something is sick or wrong or abnormal when actually it IS normal when it’s understood in its own context. But another fact may be even m…
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
309 SelfWork: How To Stop Emotional Eating and Breathe to Heal: A Conversation with Samantha Skelly
29:29
29:29
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
29:29
Samantha Skelly is such a vibrant and fascinating guest! She wrote her book several years ago - Hungry for Happiness: Stop Emotional Eating and Start Loving Yourself. And this is what she says about it: This book is how I turned my mess into my message. The journey of struggling with emotional eating, exercise addition & severe body image issues - …
T
The SelfWork Podcast
1
308 SelfWork: Five Takeaways on the Need To Be Right
28:25
28:25
Play later
Play later
Lists
Like
Liked
28:25
I began this episode thinking I’d talk about ten things I’d learned from being a therapist. But I realized that almost every one of them could be their own podcast episode. Today we’ll focus on the first – not in importance, but the first that came to mind – perhaps connected with the zeitgeist of our time. The need to be right or living being cert…
