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Lavender Mafia

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Lavender Mafia

Lavender Mafia Podcast

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Lavender Mafia is a conversational queer spirituality podcast hosted by Jess Grace Garcia and Jack Bates. Jess is a filmmaker, music producer, and worship pastor. Jack is a drag queen, theologian, and comedian. We have conversations exploring what it means to be fully queer and Christian. We get into theology, sexuality, politics, culture etc. So we talk about some deep topics...and, the deeper the better. :) We hope you’ll join us in figuring out what integrating queerness and religion—or n ...
 
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show series
 
This week Jess & Jack have a discussion about prayer. We talk about what it is (and isn’t), what we were taught about prayer growing up, what shame and personality types have to do with it, and what our relationships are to prayer now. Hit us up on our social medias to tell us what prayer means to you, how you pray (if you do), and how you would re…
 
This week Jess & Jack respond to a listener question about gender and sexuality labels. We talk about the ways in which our labels have changed over time, the difficulty and importance of keeping up with new labels, as well as the tension between using widely-understood but not-quite-accurate labels vs. using more accurate but niche terms. Visit li…
 
This week’s Jess & Jack respond to a listener question that’s more of a co-host question: Jack asks Jess what good Christian music is to a queer Christian like themself who has left behind the evangelical contexts that introduced (or subjected) them to Christian worship, along with the music itself. Jess talks about their own worship music, recomme…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a conversation about getting sick and, relatedly, explain our unintentional summer hiatus. We talk about our experiences getting COVID and battling virus-shaming. We also talk about monkeypox: what it is, how it seems to spread (and how it doesn’t), similarities with both COVID and HIV, and the harms of talking about it a…
 
This week Jess & Jack respond to a listener who wonders if we’d live in an LGBTQ-only country if we could. We talk about the pros and cons, how dynamics of marginalization would change, the most queer form of government, and how the straight world would fall apart without us. Visit linktr.ee/lavmafia for our IG, Twitter, Facebook community page, Di…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a conversation about prom: our own prom experiences, whether we got lucky after, and what we wish had been different—from fashion to our gender expression and the number and gender of our dates. We also talk about the queer prom that Jack is planning with their church, All Saints Church in Pasadena, CA, on June 10th at 6:…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a conversation about time. We talk about time travel: whether it’s possible and where/when we would go if we could. We also talk about the ways in which queer people relate to time differently from our cishet counterparts: the what and why of “Queer People Time,” as well as how milestone events in queer lives often occur …
 
This week Jess & Jack have a conversation about queer friend break-ups. We talk about how queer friendships often blur lines between friendship and romantic/sexual relationships, and how that complicates the ending of friendships among queer people, as well as how to navigate a friend break-up when everyone knows everyone else. We also talk about s…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a conversation about evangelism. We talk about The Eyes of Tammy Faye, what we think of when we think of evangelists, and the ways our previous faith contexts used shame and fear to push evangelism strategies of emotional manipulation. We also talk about why our current faith contexts have no place for evangelism, why uni…
 
This week Jess & Jack respond to a listener question about what we think about trans people seeking to be re-baptized after transitioning. We talk about the meaning of baptism, how to weigh theological vs. pastoral concerns, as well as the ways that we are (and aren’t) the same people after transition. Jess & Jack have a spirited disagreement, even…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a conversation about faith. We talk about what it is (and isn’t) and how our previous and current faith contexts talk about it, including whether it’s like sitting on a chair. We also talk about what it looks like for each of us to put our faith into action, from social justice and advocacy to therapy and partaking of the…
 
This week Jess & Jack respond to a queer listener who wants to know in what order it’s best to come out: friends, then family, or vice-versa. We talk about how there’s no one-size-fits-all order to coming out, the pros and cons of dipping a toe in the water vs. jumping in the deep end, and the family/friend social dynamics involved in coming out. W…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a conversation about cults. We talk about what they are, how to spot them, and the differences between cults and other religious groups. We also talk about the ways the churches of our conservative Christian were very cult-like, as well as the ways that progressive faith spaces replicate the same cult-like qualities of th…
 
This week Jess & Jack share the story of Kit, a listener who grew up steeped in the purity culture of conservative evangelicalism, walked away from her faith in college, and came back to it recently, only to find their home church’s teachings sickening (and not in the good way). By learning to queer Jesus, embracing God’s love for her, and blowing …
 
This week Jess & Jack have a conversation about the recent viral TikTok song and certified bop “God Is a Freak,” by Peach PRC. We talk about Christian purity culture’s obsession with sex, how they project that onto God, and the ways God does (and doesn’t) care about what you do/is done to you in your bedroom or on your couch. Visit linktr.ee/lavmaf…
 
This week Jess & Jack respond to a queer listener who wants to know if God is ever going to give her a spouse. We talk about how much or little we think God intervenes in our search for romantic and sexual partners, as well as some of the harmful things Christian purity culture teaches about God “bringing someone along when you’re ready.” We also t…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a conversation about kink-shaming. We talk about our most shameable kinks, as well as the sexual activities we just can’t see ourselves getting into and why. We also talk about when making ethical evaluations of sexual activity is kink-shaming (and when it isn’t), as how motivations affect the morality of kinks (for bette…
 
This week Jess & Jack share the story of Pip, a trans non-binary Christian listener from Minneapolis who matched with Jack on a queer dating app (no, not Grindr). They grew up in a small-town hellfire-and-brimstone church, were bullied for coloring outside the gender boxes, and ended up hearing the Christian message of God’s love and grace toward a…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a discussion about polyamory from biblical & theological perspectives. Does the presence of poly relationships in the Bible mean that the Bible supports them? What about biblical prohibitions of poly relationships? We also talk about The Reformation Project, an LGBTQ Christian organization, their recent strongly anti-poly…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a discussion about polyamory: what it means to be poly; different ways to be poly; and benefits, challenges, and misconceptions. We also talk about whether being poly is a choice or whether you’re born this way, baby; and polyphobia in the church and in society. ICYMI: we have merch! Go to lavmafia.com to pre-order your v…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a discussion about cheating: why people cheat on their partners, what “counts” as cheating to us, and how cheating is (and isn’t) relative. We also talk about what evangelical purity culture says about cheating, “emotional affairs,” and the polyphobia and biphobia in cheating discourses. ICYMI: we have merch! Go to lavmaf…
 
For the second and last of our Advent series, Jess & Jack have a discussion centered on the third and fourth weeks of Advent. We talk about joy, how joy is different from happiness, and the queer anarchist energy of John the Baptist. We also talk about the different ways that both conservative and progressive Christians are wrong about what love is…
 
This week Jess & Jack have a discussion centered on hope and peace, the two themes of the first two weeks of Advent, the time in which some Christian traditions prepare to celebrate the birth of Jesus. We talk about what hope and peace are, what we hope for (and against), and seeking inner peace vis-à-vis seeking the peace of the community or the w…
 
This week, Jess & Jack have a conversation about the recent Trans Day of Remembrance. Jack talks about a TDoR service he and his fiancé helped lead at their Episcopal church. They also respond to a listener question about how churches can love trans people better. Jess talks about helping her older mainline congregation figure out pronouns—human an…
 
This week Jess & Jack respond to a listener who wants to know how churches could ever make it up to LGBTQ people for the history of oppression they’ve caused us. We talk about oppressors who seek “forgiveness” without ceasing to oppress, what makes a good LGBTQ ally, and getting that sweet, sweet queer reparations money. We also go off, sis, on chu…
 
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