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This podcast is all about Couples and the 3C’s: Communication, Conflict, Connection. These are not skills you automatically have when you get into a relationship, but that need to be developed to overcome the inevitable challenges that will come up. Couples who listen to the podcast say, “are they watching us?!” because of how extremely relatable and practical to your day-to-day life together these topics are! Hosts Jocelyn and Aaron Freeman are authors of The Argument Hangover and their pro ...
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As parents, we know that feeling of guilt from knowing that our kiddos saw or heard the argument. But instead of guilty, we want you to become motivated to focus on the 3 keys in this episode. Make sure they see you: DE-ESCALATE the rising emotion and conflict Implement a constructive pause, and not a rupture Fully REPAIR after an argument For more…
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The 30-Day Couples Challenge starts THIS week, so sign up here: https://mycoupleschallenge.com/ In this episode, we dive into the subtle ways that effort can dwindle once we've achieved our goals. Think about athletes reaching their peak or accomplishing a major milestone in your personal life—there's a loss of that initial hunger and drive. The sa…
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You know that conflicts will happen in a marriage, this truth should not be resisted or avoided. However what if that same conflict comes up again and what if that turns into a pattern that shows up over and over again? This is what creates a hard season in marriage. But if this goes on for multiple weeks, months, or even years then you feel as if …
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The obvious statement is that men and women differ in how they emotionally connect. But the actions one can take to close the gap between how men and women connect is not as practical. Couples get stuck in the trap of “I just don’t connect the same way as my partner”. In this episode you are going to hear 3 different ways that men feel emotionally …
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Do you ever wish that you were back in that infamous "honeymoon" stage of your marriage? Believe us we understdand why we hear this from couples. You want to be in that feeling of newness, optimism, passion, and infinite possibilites with a true partner at your side. There is something to honor about this stage but the reality is that this is not j…
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Do you ever feel that your partner just doesn’t understand and that they just don’t empathize with what you are feeling? This is a big topic for many couples. A key element of a great relationship is that you can be going through a difficult time (even if caused by your partner) and you have a partner that can be comforting and compassionate to be …
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You can feel so taken off guard and frustrated when a seemingly simple conversation with your partner escalates into a conflict. When this happens both of you tend to say or do things that do more damage to the other. This is even more irritating because it could have been easily avoided in your mind. This is exactly the point of this episode, the …
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At first you might not think that you feel any jealousy in your marriage. But jealousy is simply the feeling of unhappiness or anger because someone has something you want. Yet there are others that might feel this emotion more prevalently. In this episode you will understand more about jealousy and where it can come from. Then you will have 5 step…
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Understanding the concepts of inner child and shadow patterns is crucial for a healthy marriage. We are not going to sugarcoat this either, it's one of the most difficult yet necessary things to do. In this podcast, you will explore how these two aspects can impact your behavior and dynamic in your relationship. Then you will learn practical strate…
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By now you know that repairing after your conflicts with your partner is one of the most critical aspects for a marriage. It might even be the most critical. If you do not repair, you just create more problems later on and you drive an emotional wedge between you. Repair is not an easy thing to do for two reasons that you will hear in this episode.…
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Is it just random and based on your inherent personality traits whether you are a great spouse and partner? What if it wasn’t so much about your personality traits anyway, as it was other character traits that you could develop along the way? That would feel encouraging and empowering to us, and it should to you as well! To us it doesn’t matter as …
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We don't do this often so make sure you attend our FREE LIVE WebClass on March 30th, 2023: Why Are We Arguing Again? a weblcass to identify the real root causes of conflict so you can ultimately resolve them When a challenge comes up in your life or you have a conflict with your partner, do you shrink down to your default responses or rise to the o…
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Red flags in regards to relationships are warning signs. But often these warning signs are spoken about as a reflection into the past as a reason to have gotten out of the relationship earlier. Though this is a fine practice if you are dating or even engaged, when it comes to a committed marriage, these red flags signify something different. These …
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At this point you know that arguments are going to happen. It’s not the right goal to try and not have them. It’s all about the repair. Now a big problem that you have likely experienced yourself is that when you try and come back to the conversation, it just escalates and you relive the whole argument. Now you are probably even more angry and frus…
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In a marriage is it right to have expectations or does that just set you up for failure? If the answer is no, is it even the right goal to not have any expectations at all? When it comes down to your practical day to day life with your partner, the fact is you will have expectations, this cannot be avoided. Expectations are also the root cause of a…
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Love can feel simple and effortless in the beginning stages of a relationship, but it's not always easy to maintain that feeling over time. In this episode, we explore the 5 essential parts of love in a marriage that can help couples maintain and even grow their love for each other. We discuss how each part of love plays a crucial role in building …
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As you now know from listening to this podcast, repairing conflicts is a critical skill to have a great relationship. BUT there is actually a key aspect of “conflict repair” that allows you to repair faster and more effectively. The opposite is actually just as true if not even more so. If you do not get this initial step correct, then it will lead…
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Communication should seek to connect rather than disconnect. When you get to a place of one being right and one wrong then you are just creating the environment of disconnection. This isn’t the feeling you really want in a relationship, and you certainly do not come up with the best ideas for action that best serve the relationship itself. In this …
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Resources For Your Relationship: NEW REPAIR GUIDE: A step-by-step guide to repairing after an argument; to ensure it’s resolved for good and get back to being truly connected as a couple. It’s the Making Up & Moving Forward Guide and it’s only $19. About the Episode: You will face obstacles and hardships in your life as a couple. These hardships wi…
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What does it mean to be a truly great communicator in your relationship? There is the idea that this means you will dramatically reduce the amount of tensions or challenges that you face. Relatively speaking that might be true but that is not the ONE thing that couples have in common who are great at communicating! In this episode you will hear wha…
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This episode provides bold reminders for the women to make positive changes in the relationship. It’s easy to find ourselves unconsciously acting in ways that aren’t our best, which can deplete and diminish the love in the relationship. This episode provides you the “tough love” that your friends and family won’t provide for you. We’re all human an…
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This episode is a strong invitation for the men to step up and be a leader of the relationship. Being a leader is about acknowledging where you can be a better person and a better partner. It’s about looking at the patterns that you have that are not serving you or the relationship. Then go to work on transforming those patterns first before asking…
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Forgiveness is one of the most important aspects of a relationship. It is usually spoken about as this thing that should be easy to do however. Mainly because it’s accompanied by the statement “just let it go and move past it already!” But forgiveness isn’t an easy thing to do and just moving on creates an environment for it to just pop up later. O…
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When you get down to it, your life is not made up of big exciting events, it’s actually all the tiny moments that make up the large majority of your life. That being said, are these moments fun, playful, connected, or intentional? Or do you fall trap to them being mundane, frustrating, disconnected, or checked out? In this episode you will hear 3 d…
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For those of you that are parents, did that make your marriage more difficult or bring you both together? This could be asked about any challenge that you face as a couple, but parenting is definitely unique, at least it has been for us! We polled parents and found that it often changed their marriage in some common ways: they felt they became room…
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The end of the year is always a time for reflection. Typically this is about personal and professional events and how we would have liked them to go differently. This is also a prefect time to reflect on your relationship with your partner. We will all face challenges in life and it is the same in a marriage. Though every challenge is an opportunit…
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It’s likely that you have said one of these two things to your partner. “Why don’t you just accept me for who I am” or “I really need you to change this _____”. At some point in your relationship you will find yourselves getting more upset about things that your partner does, says, or ways they show up for you. Of course relationships are about sup…
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Have you never had that feeling of being perplexed and thrown off guard when you tried to bring something up to your partner? You might have had a recent upset, an event that you were frustrated by, or another emotion that you needed to express to your partner. Within a few seconds your partner dumps all their own upsets and frustrations at you; ev…
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Food that is “bland” isn’t bad or inedible, it just lacks any zest or real flavor. Marriage can take on a similar feeling too, it’s not that anything is a major problem, but you are not feeling any real zest, excitement, or even newness. As you will hear in this episode, all relationships will find themselves in this type of season for some specifi…
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This is a bit of a celebration episode for us personally… Just in the past week this podcast broke into the Top 20 relationship podcasts on Apple, we went over 100,000 followers on Instagram, and we had over 500 couples join the Fight Smarter Weblcass! (by the way if you missed the weblcass you can watch it again with this link) As you can imagine …
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Have you ever tried to validate your position during an argument by saying “Oh but that wasn’t my intention”? Have you noticed how that doesn’t help at all? At least in that moment, because it is not the right time. It shows the need to understand the big difference between intent and impact. In this episode you will hear about how intention doesn’…
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Though you, and every other couple, face different challenges in your life and marriage; why do some struggle and some thrive? Struggling doesn’t mean that you are just facing a challenge, because everyone will. Struggle then is the experience you have while facing a challenge. Of all the couples we talk to and coach, we have seen patterns between …
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A part of a thriving relationship depends on the work done by each partner to grow individually. You have heard common phrases like your “wealth grows at the extent you grow” and this could be said about your relationship as well. As much as it takes using the right skills and tools as a couple, it all starts with your own willingness to progress o…
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A part of a thriving relationship depends on the work done by each partner to grow individually. You have heard common phrases like your “wealth grows at the extent you grow” and this could be said about your relationship as well. As much as it takes using the right skills and tools as a couple, it all starts with your own willingness to progress o…
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We are just off hosting the Couples Workshop in Arizona yesterday, and this was one of the biggest takeaways from the ½ day in person event. Communication seems easy when you only think of it as “verbalizing what you are thinking”. But this often leads to the biggest communication mistake that turns simple conversations into an argument. In this ep…
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Do you feel like life is piling things onto you and your partner right now? There are defintely seasons where a lot of hard things can hit you all at once which really makes it difficult to stay positive and stay connected as a team. In this solo episode you will hear from Jocelyn to get two things to do in seasons like these. Everything, even chal…
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Here you are having a slightly tension filled conversation with your partner, then out of nowhere they bring up something from the past! “You did the same thing last week” or “this is exactly what you do, you don’t respect me”. One of the most common things we hear that escalates things quickly is the past being brought up. This is not just random …
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Men, there is something you don’t understand about your female partners… Being completely honest here, this is something that women might forget in the moment as well. When women don’t understand this about themselves then they don’t communicate in the best way or request what it is they need so that it can be received by their male partners. Men, …
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Women, there is something you don’t understand about your male partners… Being completely honest here, this is something most men don’t even understand about themselves! When men don’t understand this about themselves then they cannot even communicate or request what it is they need and default to shutting down, being silent, or even leaving the ph…
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If you have ever felt that you needed to make a difficult decision or that you have been in the same place in your marriage longer than you’ve wanted, you likely need to identify your values and adjust your priorities! Now this can be a very seasonal thing, even core values can adjust based on the season you are coming out of or wanting to enter in…
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After going through the most challenging month of my life, which of course had a major impact on Jocelyn as we went through it together, this is one of the major lessons I learned. Though you experience different challenges and varying degrees of emotional stress around them, the fact remains that challenges themselves are temporary. This realizati…
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Do you remember your wedding vows, could you tell us what they are and more importantly if you have been keeping them? Sorry if that feels like a bold and challenging question, but the point is that many of us have forgotten what we promised our spouse at the start of the marriage! There are a few reasons this happens, tune into the episode to hear…
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You are familiar with those times where you go to ask for help or share a need you have with your partner. All of a sudden you find yourself keeping score of all the things you do, comparing how much you do, and making sure then see that it’s more than they do. Now you are in a battle for what is fair and where you feel things are out of balance. I…
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The fall season has historically been a time of growing stronger or more strained as a couple. As a followup from last week, we want to cover 3 of the challenges that men are expressing in marriage right now. Does it address “everything” that every single couple is saying to us right now? Of course not. But these are 3 big ones that many are experi…
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This episode is a dose of motivation and perspective change for your marriage and life. Book a Relationship Breakthrough Session with us. This is a private 2-on-2 session to overcome any challenge you’re facing as a couple. Read more and pick your slot here.By Jocelyn & Aaron Freeman
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The fall season has historically been a time of growing stronger or more strained as a couple. That’s why we want to cover 3 of the challenges that women are expressing in marriage right now. Does it address “everything” that every single couple is saying to us right now? Of course not. But these are 3 big ones that many are experiencing, so we tho…
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Are we the only ones facing some “challenges” in life right now? Let’s talk about the real stuff going on. When you face challenges – whether in your marriage or life circumstances you’re facing – do you become smaller or bigger? “Smaller” meaning: you shrink down, become paralyzed, maybe even a victim mentality. “Bigger” meaning: you rise to the o…
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Have you had the experience of being inspired for a short amount of time, then realize something was missing to actually create the actual change you wanted in your life and marriage? Or how about with your partner... have you been frustrated because they say they are doing to make a change, only to fall back into the same patterns in just a few we…
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Having hard conversations is a part of being in a marriage. These conversations come up when you feel disconnected, when a past conflict is unresolved, or when you are feeling disconnected and want to get back to connection. Depending on each of your styles of communicating, when you go to have these conversations, you might end up in the “Pursue-W…
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