Jillie Lozanoff Podcasts

We're officially at the end of Season 2! It's been an incredible 8 weeks with you all exploring INFJs and romantic relationships. I'm so grateful to everyone asking questions and for all the messages, I love you all so much! I'll be taking a break before Season 3, but please feel free to reach out and connect with me on Instagram or email in the me…

Come join us for Q&A Thursday #7! I included timestamps below in case you want to jump back and revisit any of these topics: 0:00 | Introduction 1:22 | Why it's hard for INFJs to be the one to walk away from a relationship; valuing ourselves for loyalty and commitment to our relationships (Lauren) 12:33 | ESTJs and INFJs: Differences in decision-ma…

Today's episode explores why break-ups can be so difficult for INFJs. Sometimes break-ups can be drawn out, but other times we'll "door slam" and completely disconnect from our emotions and our partner. Learning to stay strong in ourselves is so important, along with allowing ourselves to grieve what we've lost: Both the loss of the relationship, a…

Come join us for Q&A Thursday #6! I included timestamps below in case you want to jump back and revisit any of these topics: 0:00 | Introduction 0:40 | The reasons why people with anxious attachment often end up in relationships with avoidant partners; why avoidant partners pull away in relationships and struggle with intimacy (Monique) 13:33 | Why…

Today's episode explores why INFJs have difficulty with expectations in our relationships. Our Ni (introverted intuition) naturally looks to the future, and we often have an idealistic vision of how we believe our relationships should be. This can be a strength of INFJs, but it can also lead to us putting unhealthy pressure on ourselves and other p…

Come join us for Q&A Thursday #5! I included timestamps below in case you want to jump back and revisit any of these topics: 0:00 | Introduction 0:50 | Moving from anxious attachment into secure attachment: Recognizing triggers, labeling feelings, thoughts, and beliefs; communicating with our partner when anxiety flares up, and the importance of ou…

Today we are discussing attachment styles. Attachment styles are the different ways that we relate to and connect with our partner in romantic relationships. There are 4 attachment styles: Secure (low anxiety, low avoidance): You are comfortable with emotional intimacy, and you feel connected with your partner. You don't feel overly anxious, nor do…

Come join us for Q&A Thursday #4! I included timestamps below in case you want to jump back and revisit any of these topics: 0:00 | Introduction 0:33 | Exploring Ti decision-making, love and appreciation languages for T types vs. F types, learning to speak your partner's language (Katrina) 6:45 | Ti types value independence and resist outside influ…

Today we are discussing attachment needs in relationships. There are many types of attachment needs, but a few important needs include: Emotional and physical safety, feeling validated and valued by your partner, feeling accepted, emotional connection and intimacy, vulnerability, empathy, mutual trust and respect, and relational repair. Some of the…

Come join us for Q&A Thursday #3! I included timestamps below in case you want to jump back and revisit any of these topics: 0:00 | Introduction 1:52 | Learning to trust again after being hurt in the past, opening up and being vulnerable while dating someone new (Teresa) 12:21 | Fe development in long-term relationships: Setting boundaries around n…

Today we are exploring our romantic partner: the second pillar of building healthy, connected relationships. INFJs can sometimes experience blurred boundaries and confusion between our own identity and the identity of our romantic partner. It is important that each person is separate and feels whole, so that healthy connection can develop without t…

Come join us for Q&A Thursday #2! I included timestamps below in case you want to jump back and revisit any of these topics: 0:00 | Introduction 2:46 | Taking care of our partners emotionally, exploring signs of codependence vs. interdependence (Tina, Samantha) 12:02 | How to handle feelings of intense attraction while dating or in early relationsh…

Today we are diving into self-discovery: the first pillar of building healthy, connected relationships. As INFJs we often are so focused on emotionally caring for our partner that we forget about our own needs! We also sometimes minimize or downplay our needs because we fear being rejected, feeling like a burden, or being perceived as needy. INFJs …

Today is our first Q&A Thursday! I included timestamps below in case you want to jump back and revisit any of these topics: 0:00 | Introduction 2:16 | MBTI type compatibility: INFJ & ISTP; Jillie's thoughts about type compatibility (Sarah) 10:19 | Dating anxiety, overanalyzing in early relationships (Ashlyn) 16:35 | Letting go of the need to "fix" …

We are kicking off Season 2 today, and it's all about romantic relationships! As INFJs we greatly value our relationships, particularly with a romantic partner. We often prioritize meaningful connection and depth in our relationships, and we have high expectations of ourselves and our partners. However, the nature of being an INFJ comes with some u…

Hello everyone! Season 2 starts on Monday, August 15th, whoo hoo! Season 2 is all about romantic relationships! I've received the most questions about INFJs and relationships, so we're taking a relationship deep dive during Season 2 (and I'm SO excited!!) We'll continue having episodes on Monday and Thursday, with a small change: Monday's episode w…

We're wrapping up Season 1 in today's episode! I'll be taking a short break and preparing for Season 2, I'll be back on August 11 to announce a small change to the show format (I'm SO excited for it!!) Please feel free to send me a DM on Instagram or an email with any topics or questions in the meantime, I love you all!! ~Jillie ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~…

INFJs often experience hardship or trauma early in life, and it can shape our identity as we grow up. We're often taught that our value as a person lies in our ability to take care of people, and to make other people happy. This can lead to people pleasing, prioritizing other people over ourselves, and neglecting our own needs. Over time we can beg…

Personal growth takes us on a journey of ups, downs, and everything in between. For a long time I believed that “hitting rock bottom” was the hardest thing we can experience in life… but I’ve realized that sometimes it’s even scarier once we‘ve made a little forward progress and realize how much we were struggling at our lowest point. I wanted to s…

During times of prolonged stress, INFJs can be taken over by our inferior function extraverted sensing (Se). These episodes of “Se grip” can cause us to feel like a different person, moving a million miles an hour and unable to slow down. Se grip can also occur suddenly after a long period of Ni-Ti loop, when our brain delivers a “jolt” psychologic…

There are many different things in our external environment that can make us feel overstimulated and drain our energy: Interacting with other people, tackling challenging cognitive tasks, and handling unexpected stressful situations, among many others! These types of stimuli are processed through our extraverted sensing (Se). As our inferior functi…

INFJs can struggle with taking people's words personally, especially if the person says something hurtful or critical. We naturally use our inferior extraverted sensing (Se) to absorb external information, then we internalize and "read into" the underlying meaning with our dominant introverted intuition (Ni). This can lead to us misinterpreting wha…

INFJs highly value emotional connection and depth with our close relationships. We naturally invest a lot of energy into nurturing intimacy with our partners and people close to us, so we can struggle with navigating relationships when we don't receive that same effort back in return. INFJs are especially at risk of this happening when we are in a …

INFJs often struggle with over-analyzing and getting stuck in our heads, especially with our close relationships. When we are unable to use our healthy Fe (extraverted feeling) decision-making function, we are left to analyze and attempt to make decisions with our Ti (introverted thinking) function. INFJs naturally seek emotional closure in our rel…

INFJs often feel like outsiders, especially in a world that greatly values concrete measurable logic over intangible intuition. If we're not careful, we can fall into the habit of believing that we need to explain our every decision in order for our opinions to be valued by other people. This is especially true if our partners are ST or NT types, b…

In this episode we explore why INFJs thrive with external goals, and why our NJ functions have the potential for us to be incredibly powerful at working toward and achieving our goals. INFJs feel deeply connected to our purpose when we are actively making progress toward our goals and serving others, and when we can see evidence of our own growth a…

Come join me as we take a deep dive into the four functions in the INFJ cognitive stack! Understanding our introverted and extraverted functions helps to raise our awareness, so we can maintain psychological balance between our internal and external worlds. Here are the INFJ cognitive functions we're exploring in this episode: Ni = Introverted iNtu…

Today we're exploring the different letters of MBTI personality types! These letters indicate different ways that we collect information from the outside world, and how we make decisions and navigate the world around us. Extraversion vs. Introversion ~ E /I Sensing vs. iNtuition ~ S/N Thinking vs. Feeling ~ T/F Judging vs. Perceiving ~ J/P INFJs ha…

Today we're diving deep into the world of Cognitive Function Theory! Personality types are not meant to stick you into a boring generic box. Learning how your brain processes information is the first step to understanding yourself, so you can start making the changes you desire in every area of your life! If you'd like to download a companion guide…